Living with gratitude in 2016

How often do we recount our blessings?  How often do we stop throughout the day, look at our lives and have a thankful heart for all God has kept us from, the many times He's protected us and our family, for all His blessings and provisions, for just the beauty that surrounds us?

I have been guilty of operating with an ungrateful heart many times in my life.  It's easy to judge others, talk negatively, find fault, fall into depression, want more and more.  None of that is healthy.  None of it uplifts and encourages, it just wears a person down.

When I focus on what I'm thankful for I find life is more peaceful.  Somehow when operating life with a grateful heart hope blooms, joy fills the air, love fills the room and I tend to forget about the little things that try to nag at me or wake me up at the wee hours of the morning.  When those things enter my mind...the best thing I can do is turn them over to God and thank Him for taking care of them and thank Him for all the blessings He so richly pours out on my life.

I for one am looking forward to 2016!.  What does God have in store?! I know I will be blessed to share life with my amazing husband, watch my daughters continue to grow and succeed, enjoy my beautiful grandson and create new memories with family and friends.  Life has never been sweeter!

2016 is here and there's never been a better time to start living with gratitude!

The power of the invisible

For those of us who rely on modern day technology, wifi has become a necessity.  We have passwords to connect to different servers all over the place.  Our phones, notebooks, laptops are all programmed to connect automatically.  We use it to save money, have a better connection, reduce our data usage.  It is a modern day life saver.

Just as wifi connects us to the social world...faith connects us to the Master's hand.  It is our bridge to receiving His gifts, His insight, His heart.  It is our life saver.

I don't know how or when I first began exercising my portion of faith...but I did.  My faith in God and His ability to see me through the best and worst of times has always carried me.  Even during the times when I had walked away from God - I always knew He loved me and was just waiting for me to call upon Him.  I have faith that God is protecting my children, my grandson, my marriage, my husband and our families.  I have faith that God makes a way for us when we can't see the way and that He is moving on our behalf.  I have faith in God's ability - not mine. 

Now I know we all go through times when we call upon Him more...but maybe, just maybe we should start making sure we are connected to Him with the same intensity we make sure we are connected to our wifi.  We should trust God has the power to transform our lives just as we trust an invisible wireless internet connection.

As we start looking towards 2016 - let's check our faith connection.  Let's make sure we are totally and completely connected to Him.

Tests

During this season when emotions run high, energy levels are peaking and plunging, and rest is scarce we should try to keep this thought in the back of our mind.

I am not very good at practicing patience.  I dive right into things and man it just makes me mad at myself when I step back, hit rewind and replay the minutes, hours, days I wasted, leaving me disappointed and even at times, those around me.

What I hope to accomplish this season is the - take a breath and pause effect.  I want to be wise to the tests that come my way and know that not everything works out exactly as I think they should...but they will work out (eventually).

Thank you God for your mercies, they are new each and every morning.  Thank you God for your gifts, they are plentiful.  Thank you God for your spirit, it's with me at all times.

Starting over requires patience and pliability.

Here's to a beautiful Christmas Season - filled with love, joy, peace, forgiveness, and understanding! - May we all pass the tests!!

Rest in God

I am once again reminded to let go - and let God.

I have this TERRIBLE habit of trying to fix things.  I find myself trying to make things better and sometimes in the process I just make them worse.  I'm often reminded by my better half that I need to just slow down and let God take care of things.  This morning as I was getting ready for work I just felt the Lord telling me He's in full control.  I love Him and His timely reminders.

I was reading a devotional that was speaking to those of us who are this way...the author was telling us instead of worrying about it, fretting over it, talking about it...it would be in our favor to just take it to God and leave it there.  Let Him sort out the details.  Let Him make the changes where necessary.  Let Him take care of the just and the unjust.

Today I'm giving my best effort to just stand still and see the mercies of God move.

Let God fight my battles, let Him arrange my miracles, let Him move and bless as He sees fit!  In that - I am exercising my faith - growing stronger in Him!!  

Love that no matter what life throws our way - we have a God who's still alive and cares so much about each and every one of us.

A grateful heart

Last night my husband and I attended a community Christmas Concert here in our hometown.  We listened to people of all ages and religious affiliations perform.  As the music filled the room where we were all gathered, there was a sense of reverence that settled in.  We sat, dressed in our best, side by side with people who chose to come out in the cold to celebrate the reason for the season, the birth of Jesus Christ. 

As I sat there and felt the weight and warmth of my husband's arm around my shoulder I began thanking God for a beautiful year.  He's blessed me with so much.  There was a time, just a few years ago that I gave up praying for a love like I've been given.  I know so many of us have been right where I was.  Just feeling as though life will never smell sweet again, taste flavorful, feel soft....just kind of going through the motions.  Today I stand as a blessed woman.  Fully testifying of the goodness of God.  I serve a faithful God and I'm so thankful He knows our needs, wants, desires and wants nothing more than to grant us more than we ever hope for.

I know there are days when I find myself begin to grumble and complain and I need to be more conscience of that when it happens - for I am blessed beyond measure and have nothing to be sad about.  God is so good!

As we start over - we have to remember...we are truly starting over.  Let us embrace our blessings and thank God for all He's given us!  It will change our perspective and perhaps change our life's direction - I know it has mine!

A few rules to starting over

How true are these?

They seem so simple and yet so complicated when you're trying to start over in life.  

I can remember feeling like there was no way I'd ever be able to make peace with the past.  I know I spent countless hours worrying what others thought about me, I can remember trying to focus on other people and their problems so I wouldn't need to focus on mine.  I obsessed over the lack of control I had in my life.  I looked to other people to fill the void in my life and made too many bad decisions which didn't allow me to truly smile.  I was down and out and dang it, I had a right to be! Or at least I felt like I had that right.

What I didn't realize during my pity party was that I was robbing myself of so much joy.  I was denying God full access into my life and was setting a negative tone in my home with my daughters.  I had it all wrong.  I know so many others do it right - but I didn't.  It wasn't until I allowed rule number 3 to happen that I allowed my heart and mind to connect.  It wasn't until I allowed God to have full control that I began healing.  It wasn't until I realized that God's plan for my life was far better than my own that my smile returned.

Today as I look back I can see just how blinded I was in the storm.  I let the wind and rain distort my views.  I'm so thankful God was faithful and walked me through it all.  I'm so thankful that He's restored and blessed me with more than I ever imagined I'd have.  I'm so thankful He holds the world, all it's problems and challenges in His hands.

I am so thankful for God's hand in my life - His blessings are countless!

If you don't have the peace of God in your life I challenge you to give Him a try.

Here's to starting over!

Pura Vida!

Pure Life - Enjoy Life - Simply Life

#CostaRica

During the last 10 days my husband and I were blessed to be able to spend our honeymoon in Costa Rica.  What a beautiful place, such kind people sharing a common value - to enjoy life. 

As we traveled through the land on foot or by van, bus, and boat...we found ourselves in conversation discussing just how precious our life is.  We truly embraced their spirit...soaking in all the treasures found throughout the day.  Our adventure took us to three different cities...Monteverde, Arenal, and Manuel Antonio.  Each place offered new views, new tours, new people, new memories.  We found ourselves in awe of our surroundings, taking nothing for granted.

We discovered we each had some preformed opinions about the life of Costa Ricans...how wrong we were.  It didn't matter what their living situation was...whether in a $300,000 home or a $3,000 home - they were all so happy.  They seemed to have an appreciation of life that most never grasp, it was so beautiful to witness and become enveloped in.

I know for some of us we grab a hold of the value of the day early on in life - perhaps tragedy brought on the revelation - perhaps something spiritual...but not everyone tastes the beauty of every day life.  Today I want to challenge us all to look around and find the beauty in your life.  Do you have food, water, shelter, clothing?  Do you have a job, health care, transportation?  Do you have a friend or loved one you can bless?  Do you have the ability to walk, see, taste, smell, breathe?  So many aren't afforded the opportunity to enjoy these luxuries.  

We all have something to be thankful for.

I am blessed beyond measure to have found a man who's not only my best friend but someone who reminds me to slow down, stay in the moment, smile, thank God for His goodness and loves me so much that he's willing to bend his knees in prayer for me and so many others he cares about.

I'm blessed to have children who call me mom and a grandson who's arms raise to be held by his gramma - so blessed!!

So to you all I say Pura Vida!!

Starting over has brought such joy in my life.

Oh be careful little mouth what you say....

Have you ever replayed a conversation over in your mind; rewinding word after word searching for the exact phrase that either lifted your soul or tore your soul apart?  I have.

I do it in order to figure out how I can better myself and be prepared in the future.  There are so many times I've been able to just file a conversation away and never replay it again....but others - I'll wear the tape out first.  It may be a terrible habit, but I'm speaking from the heart. 

It's so important that we put a guard over our mouth when we are angry.  So often we say things we don't mean but the other person will hold on to for days, weeks and even years in some cases.  It's not easy to forget words.  The Bible tells us that from the abundance of the heart...the mouth speaketh.  So basically what ever is residing in your heart is going to come shooting out of your mouth - making it very difficult for others to believe you when you apologize for the words you've spoken.  Trust me I know this to be true because not only have I been the recipient of harsh words...I've spewed them out as well. 

Whether it's with your children, your spouse, your coworkers...choose to be kind today.  Choose to keep silent if you don't have anything nice to say.  You will save yourself and others from hurt feelings, broken hearts, and wounded spirits.  

We are all blessed with a new set of 24 hours in each day to get things right.  How about today we use our 24 hours to speak words of encouragement to one another?

Here's to starting over!

God takes care of us...

I found I needed God in a special way this weekend. As I called on God for help..I grabbed my headphones, my cell phone and turned to some of the teachings of #Joyce Meyer.  Listening to sound teaching, praying and turning to the Word of God are the tools I turn to most often.  Satan hit me in so many areas..I felt completely and utterly helpless.  Lucky for me, I have a God who holds the world in the palm of His hands.  He knows my needs before I ever go to Him in prayer. 

Satan will stop at nothing to destroy us and it's up to us to stay alerted to his tactics.  He'll use our children, our family members, our spouse, our jobs and coworkers, he'll use finances, he'll bring people into our life to trip us up...he has no respect for our lives. 

We have to turn to God instead of worrying about the situation.  We have to allow God to fight our battles and He will - He just needs us to get out of the way.

For all of us who are fighting a fight of faith - hold on.  Trust in God - He is the way maker!

Learning to sail

Storms hit suddenly and without warning.  They cause us to lose our footing, our sense of direction...storms hit believers and unbelievers alike.

God doesn't always keep us from storms, as a matter of fact...He sometimes leads us straight into the storm and at times it feels as though he's abandoned us in the midst.  Contrary to our thoughts...He's always right there - the Bible tells us about a story where Jesus was on the boat with Peter and John...the storm was raging while Jesus slept on the boat with them.  Do you think He didn't know there was a storm?  Noooo, He was fully aware but allowed the storm to rage on.  It serves as a great example of how God weathers the storm with us.  He didn't leave them...He was right there the entire time.  Just as He is with us.

I am learning to navigate through things because I trust God is with me.  I trust He has my little world, my life and my family in the palm of His hands.  So many times crisis show us a side of ourselves that we may have been blind to.  Maybe we didn't realize we had been living or believing a certain way that wasn't good for us or those around us...so instead of looking at every situation we don't agree with as a bad thing...maybe it's an opportunity for us to learn and grow; learning to trust God when life is uncertain just as we trust Him when life is calm.

Storms tend to reveal our distorted views.  So by faith I want to say that God is sovereign, has it all in control and with that knowledge I can relax and learn to sail in the midst of the storm.

Never take for granted the storms - they sometimes reveal lost treasures - start over with hope and faith that your treasures will be discovered!

Ohhh yes I am!!

This blog is about those of us who never expected to find ourselves in the place where life demanded us to begin again, but we did.

God designed a woman to be bold, confident, courageous, admired and loved.  He designed us to be a partner, someone who will assist in life's struggles, yet be able to be strong enough to stand alone.

We are women - we are sassy and sweet, soft and curvy, gentle yet strong, determined yet inquisitive, we command attention, soften the mood, we love with every fiber, we have the power to create, nurture and transform.  Women make up half of this world - and yet there is only one me!!!

I am the only Jamie there is who was formed by Roland and Margie -a beautiful mother - petite and sassy and a handsome father - tall and courageous. I am who I am and make no apologies.
I am a once in a lifetime woman!

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You may feel like you got the wind knocked out of your sails and don't see how you can ever feel confident in who you are again.  Please take it from me, you can.  Once you begin loving yourself and paying attention to who you are - you will be unstoppable.  You will never allow yourself to feel unlovable again.

Your worth isn't validated by size, color, religion, marital status or popularity.  Your worth is validated by God and you alone.  You are worthy because God says you are worthy - he has validated you!

So smile, stand a little taller and walk in confidence as you take on this day!!

What can it look like?

This blog is about those of us who never expected to find ourselves in the place where life demanded us to begin again, but we did.

If someone would have asked me 6 years ago if I could see myself remarrying, anytime soon - I would have said no.  Not yet.  I didn't trust any man, let alone want to take a chance that it would all end again some day.  I went through periods of happiness, personal growth, spiritual healing and restoration and sadness.  I had to go through all the emotions that come through the healing process before I would ever be close to ready. It wasn't easy - it took time!

As my fiance and I approach our wedding day, my mind goes over every final detail.  

This day isn't just about me, it's about two people who've made their mind up to love and cherish each other, to work together to build a great life.  It's about two people who have known what it's like to be lonely, what it's like to settle, what it's like to sacrifice, what it's like to make mistakes and live with the consequences, what it's like to find a jewel and realize you never want to live without each other.  We are not looking back at what might have been - we are looking forward to what OUR life can be.

Please don't give up on yourself or those in your life because you can't see the beauty which lies in front of you.  Sometimes it just takes....time.  Time to heal, time to grow, time to make necessary changes that allow something beautiful to grow.  

Starting over with a new frame of mind - looking forward to a life with a beautiful man - a man who loves me.  How blessed am I to be able to see how wonderful life can be!

Thank you Mrs. Jones

The 92 year old petite, well poised and proud lady, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o'clock, with her hair fashionably coifed and makeup perfectly applied, even though legally blind, moved to a nursing home today.  Her husband of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary.

After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, she smiled sweetly when told her room was ready.  As she maneuvered her walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of her tiny room, including the eyelet sheets that had been hung on her window.  "I love it," she stated with the enthusiasm of an eight year old having just been presented with a new puppy.

"Mrs. Jones, you haven't seen the room...just wait."

"That doesn't have anything to do with it," she replied.  "Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time.  Whether I like my room or not doesn't depend on how the furniture is arranged, it's how I arrange my mind.  I already decided to love it.  It's a decision I make every morning when I wake up.  I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do.  Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open I'll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I've stored away, just for this time in my life."

She went on to explain, "old age is like a bank account, you withdraw from what you've put in.  So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories.  Thank you for your part in filling my memory bank, I'm still depositing."

And with a smile, she said:  "Remember these five simple rules to be happy:

1.  Free your heart from hatred

2.  Free your mind from worries

3.  Live simply

4.  Give more

5.  Expect less."

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 May we all follow these simple rules.

Here's to starting over - seeing from the heart.

This story is not my own - I found it on the internet and am sharing with you all...too beautiful to keep to myself.

Empathy

Do you know what it means to have empathy towards someone?

It means to look at something from their eyes, hear something from their ears and try to feel the way they feel...work to understand them, their pain, their fears, feel their heart.

Last night I received a text from a dear friend of mine who was hurting.  As we text back and forth the phone rang and we began to talk.  We both shared from our hearts...each of us opening up as friends do - listening and understanding - because we have empathy towards one another.  We love each other and hate when one or both of us are facing difficult situations.  How terrible it would be if we tried to talk and words fell on deaf ears because there was no attempt to understand or feel what each other was feeling.  Guaranteed our friendship would be shallow and not last a lifetime.  Thank God our friendship is strong and we can be there for one another.

We will all face trying times. Try to place yourself in their shoes and do your best to understand what they are going through.  I have and I'm sure will face many more trials in my life that will knock the wind out of my sails...maybe they are all just moments in life's classroom that help prepare me so I'm better able to understand someone else's pain in the future...whatever it is...I pray someone shows empathy towards me.  We need each other.  Everyone is facing something we know absolutely nothing about...practice being empathetic today, it will help you in starting over and perhaps someone else.

I pray God gives us all an extra dose today.

Brick by brick

This morning as I sit here thinking about what's on my heart, I have to think about what got me to this point.  My foundation had been destroyed after my divorce.

 I realized there are two kinds of people in life - those who knock you down and those who lift you up. It's funny because the majority that threw bricks were in church - judging the situation without knowledge of what was truly happening because I did not talk about it.  I just kept to myself for the most part.  It wasn't until later down the road that I opened up and shared....by that time, I'd found out who my true friends were.

Today I know who I am as a woman.  Today I stand tall in God's grace.  I know the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords is my fortress and holds me in the palm of His hands.  I know God to be my sure foundation no matter what storms blow my way and can testify to others that if you just hold on He'll bring you through - you can use each brick thrown at you as a stepping stone.

Keep your chin up, pray for those who are against you and keep walking forward!

Here's to starting over - brick by brick!!!

Traditions

This past week I was sharing some of the traditions I've set with my daughters over the years with my soon to be mother-in-law.  I began telling her how it's always been so exciting for us on Christmas morning to go through our stockings.  We always contribute to each other's stocking, loading it chalk full of fun and sometimes useless trinkets.  However, small, trivial or fun each thing is - we truly just enjoy that time together.  Well this year, Greg and I will have the privilege of having his mother with us on Christmas morning too...so there will be a couple new stockings to fill.  I can't wait!

Sometimes it seems a bit overwhelming when blending families.  One family does one thing and the other, something completely different.  The beautiful thing is - it gives us the opportunity to partake in something new.  It allows us to share in each other's excitement and get to know each other better.  

As the time of year approaches where traditions start showing up - don't have a closed mind.  Open yourself up to something new, ask your kids, your spouse, your friends what they like to do and perhaps you and yours will find you're creating a new tradition in your life this year.

I for one am totally excited to start new traditions.  Memories in the making!

Have a great Halloween weekend everyone.

Dress up, smile, laugh, and enjoy life, be safe!! You only have one life to live!!!

It's time to stop worrying about being right - and just be happy

My sweetheart and I are just 16 days away from pledging our vows in front of our closest immediate family members.  We've invited a small number in order to keep our budget down and keep our ceremony intimate; it is our day after all.  We have 15 including the minister and his wife who will be in attendance with us as we begin our journey as husband and wife. 

We've been blessed with amazing family members who could have had hurt feelings by not receiving an invite - but yet, looked past their own opinions and saw our heart and desire and have fully supported us - calling, sending texts and emails letting us know how happy they are that we've found each other.  Then on the opposite side we've heard negative remarks and had a few turn down our invitation to share in our day because they felt we were not being kind by not inviting others as well.  That's their choice and I didn't argue with them, I just let our chef know we'll have a few less plates at the dinner table.

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If we are always striving to please everyone - we will lose ourselves in the midst of the purpose.

I would be miserable if I gave in to the guilt party of those who were upset - extended invitations and put a financial burden on my sweetheart.  We would then have to open the list to both sides of our families in order to keep everyone happy, all the while putting a strain on our relationship.

I refuse.

Now...I can relax, knowing the family who is there, truly have Greg's and my best interest at heart.  They have no agenda to make us look negative toward others, they haven't talked negatively behind our backs - they're genuinely happy for our future together and are excited to share this moment in time with us.

I have no anger or bitterness towards those who don't wish to join us, it's their choice.

I'm so excited about starting over with this beautiful man - showing my daughters that love does exist and God truly does care about our wants, needs and desires - I don't have time to be unhappy!

Please pass the salt....

Salt has been used since the beginning of time.  Prized by the ancient Greeks, Hebrews, Romans, Byzantines, Hittites, and the Egyptians. It was used in trading, wars have been fought over salt, it's cultural significance is known around the world.

In biblical times it was used as a preserving agent, used in sanctification ceremonies, used as an antiseptic, and used to add flavor.  Metaphorically it's been used to signify permanence, loyalty, durability, fidelity, usefulness, value and purification.  It's so common, yet so valuable. 

 I want flavor in my life.  I want there to be a preserving agent, keeping me in tact; strong and healthy.  I hope that my life adds flavor to those who are around me.  I pray I'm able to be a positive influence in their lives.  I pray that when people are hurting and they turn to me (as a believer in Christ) that I'm able to offer prayers of healing to their hurting hearts.  I want to be a valuable resource to them.

So the next time you grab the salt remember it's not just "salt" it's a reminder that we aren't here just because.  Your journey of starting over may just be that you are discovering your true purpose.  Why are you here?  Well...you're here to add flavor.  You're here to preserve God's promise that He loves each and everyone of us.  We matter to Him and He's coming back one day for His children.

Progressive

adjective

Happening or developing gradually or in stages; proceeding step by step

Life should be progressive.

If it's not...we are in trouble.  We should be developing our outter, inner and spiritual man in stages.  Never staying stagnate - always growing.  Always making steps to become a healthier version of our best self.

Maybe you have found yourself with a blurred vision of your purpose.  With this I am speaking of your emotional or spiritual man - if you are there.  The best physician is Jesus.  He's right there waiting to see you through.  The thing is...He's a true gentleman and won't barge in on you.  He's just waiting for you to invite Him to be there with you.  All you have to do is call on His name and He'll be right there.  Tell Him what you're battling or going through.  Ask Him for His comfort and His hand in your life.  I promise you - He will not hurt or betray you.  I promise you He will lift your spirits and bring joy and purpose to your life.

Jesus has given my life purpose.  He's added to it daily.  And just like my new progressive lenses...I'm proceeding in life step by step.

Here's to starting over, with God at the helm.

Love is....

I know we all have this "picture" in our minds of what love is supposed to look like, feel like, smell like.   As a young girl I paid attention to the boys who treated their girlfriends like a princess.  I watched as girls would get flowers sent to them at school, or as they took them out to dinner and movie.  There was always a least one romance movie that drew me in.  I'd buy the soundtrack to the movie, listen to song after song, memorizing the words...dancing in my bedroom while no one was watching, pretending I was "that" girl.  I was a hopeless romantic - and to be honest, I still am.

What I'm learning about love the older I become is that it isn't all about "feelings" and fluff.  It's not all about what society says it needs to look like or feel like.  Love is shown in so many forms, we just need to pay attention.

I don't like to brag, but I'm going to.  I have truly been blessed with a man who has taken loving me to heart.  We like many other couples have been faced with difficult days but determination has kept us from giving up - or shall we just call it as it is - love kept us from giving up.

It takes two to commit to a loving relationship.  It takes patience, kindness/respect, it takes protection - both physically and emotionally, it has to be built on trust, it has to have hope or a feeling of expectancy for a beautiful life, it has to persevere  - to stay the course without giving up and it cannot fail.  Love conquers all - because it is formed with determination and is unstoppable.

There is no greater example for us to follow than Christ.  His love is so pure, so gentle, so forgiving.  His love is there to serve us, guide us, restore us and give us hope that our lives and relationships can be filled with a promise of a beautiful healthy life. 

Love yourself - love your spouse - love your children - love your parents - friends and neighbors.  

Water the love in your own garden and see just how beautiful it grows!

Hello there, He's totally into miracles!

Do you find yourself faced with doubts and uncertainty?  Do you feel like you're in a no win situation and feel like giving up?  We've allll been there and guess what...God is still on the throne and still in the business of performing miracles!!!  Not once have I ever read in the Bible that His gifts are for a select few.  He LOVES proving Himself to be mighty and strong.  He loves to flex his muscles on our behalf.  He loves picking us up when we are falling apart and loves to guide us when life is grand.  We have to keep our eyes off the problem and look to Him as the solution provider.

Life isn't a fairy tale.  Life does happen.  There are highs and lows in all of our lives but we can't get so caught up in what's not working right and lose focus on what is.

I am trusting in God to work miracles in all our lives.

Remember as you start over, we are all given a measure or portion of faith.  Exercise your portion today, trusting that God will work on your behalf!

He's working on mine!!!

What kind of example are you?

I can say I have not always been the best example.  I don't pride myself in that truth, but I don't lie about it either.  I have two daughters who have experienced things in life that they should never have experienced and I believe some came from following my lead.  I hate that they will learn some things the hard way.  However, I am amazed at their strength and determination to get it right.

Through falling down, getting back up, choosing right, choosing wrong, trying and trying again I have found people watch.  They watch each and every thing you do and listen to everything that comes from your mouth.  If you are a Christian...they want to see you live it.  If you are constantly telling people how to parent, they want to see you parent perfectly, if you are constantly telling people they need to lose weight...well, they wanna see that you are the picture of lean muscle and perfect health.  If our words don't match up to our actions - we aren't setting a good example.

I was praying in the shower this morning and began weeping, praying that God would help me be the woman my future husband needs.  To be the mother my daughters need and be the grandma my sweet impressionable grandson needs.  I want to be honorable.  I want to be loving.  I want to be nurturing and care about their needs, wants and desires as much as my own.  I don't want to say I'm these things and perhaps they feel differently because my actions haven't met up with my words.

I am so aware of my mortality.  I am so confident that my life will one day end and all that will remain is my example.  I pray the man I love knows how deeply he is loved, wanted, cherished.  I pray my daughters know how they inspire me, how much I love them, I hope they know that I pray for them and their walk with God.  I pray my grandson knows how precious he is to me and that I pray for God's hand in his life...this is the example I pray I'm leaving behind.

Don't lose sight of the end result as you start over.

Lord help us all to remember this.

Pat yourself on the back

The beauty of growing older doesn't come in wrinkles, gray hair, body parts that fail us at times.  Not even in the aches and pains of exercising or exploring something new.  The beauty of growing older comes from finding out just who you are.  Finding out who you were meant to be and creating that life for yourself.

To any woman who's had to count the change to put gas in your car, work long hours just to hope you can pay your bills, hand wash your kids' clothes so they'd be clean, went on a forced fast in order to make sure your children ate and you took the time to pray that God would provide,  to any woman who pushed herself to gain an education despite the odds, to any woman who prayed for her family and believed that life would get better one day...to the woman who never gave up on herself or those she loves...pat yourself on the back!!!

For those women who weren't strong enough in their past but now have allowed the past to make you strong - you too need to pat yourself on the back!!

Whoever you are, I thank you!

What a day it's been.  I had to run into town to grab some gifts for "Boss's Day" and while doing so I met a super sweet woman.  We just clicked.  As we chatted back and forth we realized just how small this world is.  We knew some of the same people, we shared some of the same life experiences, we stood and talked like old friends, what a treat.

I'm taking nothing for granted...the good, the bad, the ugly.  Every experience has left me with something to draw from.  Each person I've had the privilege to meet has left an impression on my life.  Whether they've hurt me, lifted me up, stayed by my side, left without warning...it doesn't matter, they all have contributed to my life in some form and I'm thankful.  It's because of them I can appreciate my role as a mom, a grandma, a girlfriend, an employee, a friend.  It's because of them I have stories to tell and memories to cherish.  It's because of them I know pain doesn't last forever and joy comes in the morning.  It's because of them, I learned I have a God who has never left me or forsaken me and calls me by name.

To whomever you are...thank you for molding me into the strong, happy, sensitive woman I am today!

Thank you all for helping me realize it was okay for me to start over....and to Andrea...the woman I met today, your future will be greater than your past!!!

Hello Gorgeous!

Don't you love it when you go shopping and find something new...a new blouse, new shoes, new jeans, new jewelry, New Anything?!!  I certainly do.  I have recently gone through my "things" sifting out the old and realized it is time to part with some items I once loved; 

they just don't fit in my life anymore.  

Some things I had held on to for years as they had memories attached to them, others reminded me of a thinner, more youthful me and then some things...well, I just can't explain why I still had them, lol!! What I do know...it's time to make a clothing donation!  Why hold on to these things?  Why have them hang in the closet taking up precious space?  

Getting rid of them frees me to....well....replace them! :)

I generally try to gain some sort of lesson out of big events in my life and with cleaning out my closet on the literal side, I realized it's time to clean my closet on the emotional side as well.  Clean it of the need to please others, clean it of the need to make everyone happy, clean it of the need to be accepted by everyone or to rearrange my life in order to accommodate others.  

For those of us who have found ourselves at a crossroad in life and realize we've had some things holding us back - it's time to let go.  We need to free ourselves from anything that keeps pulling us down.  Some people can't stand it when others progress; misery loves company.  If you have people in your life who constantly knock you down, it's okay to make room in your life for those who truly care about you and want to see you happy.

It's impossible to enjoy your new walk if you're constantly getting tossed into someone else's misery.  Stand up for yourself!!

Today is a great day to give yourself permission to move on.  Be with those who love you, who encourage you, who support you.  Surround yourself with things that give you purpose - I promise you when you do - You will find out who you were meant to be!!

My motto!

No way am I going to look at my past and be like..."I miss those days so much, I will never be happy like that again".  Sure I had wonderful happy days in my past.  We all have had that...but this woman is going to live out the next chapter better than the last!

Think about it...we are older, wiser...we know who we are.  We know what we want now.  We have the power to create our perfect future.  This doesn't mean you'll be rewarded with riches untold or a home so grand you feel like you're living the life of royalty.  What it means is...that no matter what circumstance you're living in...you can be the happiest you've ever been. 

I talk to the man of my dreams quite frequently...lol, and he tells me this is the happiest he's ever been in his life.  I know the life he's led prior to me and I find that to be the greatest compliment.  He's played football in front of thousands, he's traveled all over, dated beautiful women, shared the company of great men and women...and he is happiest right now.  This is how life is meant to be!  Take all those experiences, live and learn, grow from them so they allow you to fully appreciate the moment in time you are living in.

I'm thankful for the past, it's taught me to appreciate what I have today.  Take nothing for granted, it's here today and gone tomorrow.  Looking forward to each moment ahead - memories to be made with my daughters, their sweethearts, my beautiful grandson and the love of my life.

Starting over...looks beautiful!

Taking this to heart...for myself

I have not, nor do I claim to have it all together.  I'm not the know-it-all guru of life.  I fall, I make mistakes and if I learn I've hurt someone, I want to seek forgiveness.  I don't have a malicious side of me that wishes to hurt or tear people down.  I'm a problem solver, a fixer and sometimes in my need to fix a situation...I fumble.

We all find ourselves faced with situations that open the door to this behavior or reaction and although we may do right 99.9% of the time...it's that .1% that causes problems.  

I ask God to work in me so that I might continue to find His grace.  That I would continue to work on myself so that I may bring Him glory.

I apologize today to anyone I have hurt with my words.

Say goodbye to fear

What are you afraid of?

Afraid of losing your job, your money, your family, your friends?  Are you afraid of being alone?  Are you afraid of letting people down?  Are you afraid of death?

There are answers for all of these things.

Don't allow "life" and the people in this life to minimize God's promises for you!

God doesn't manipulate us...God doesn't force His hand on us.  He loves us, in spite of us.

When you are overwhelmed with life...take some time to read these scriptures.  They will bring peace to your soul.

Starting over in life doesn't guarantee us that we will walk through life without a worry or care...but when we hold on to God's hand, that walk becomes much easier.

Have a great Monday!!!

I've earned my stripes

I know very few of us have been blessed to give birth to our children without a single stretch mark or scar.  It's both embarrassing and beautiful.  Embarrassing because very few of us look in the mirror and see the beauty at all times and would shudder to have someone see us naked.  Beautiful because we know what it took to bring them on.  

For some women it's not just pregnancy....for some, it's a battle of mind, will and survival.  Our situations, our health, our lives aren't the same.  I have a girlfriend who has a terrible time controlling her weight.  She doesn't eat junk, her body's chemistry is off and she has to take medications to regulate it...a side effect is weight gain.  It has left her scars and a terrible case of insecurity, although she is truly beautiful -both inside and out.  I know another woman who fights to gain weight...her tiny body is so fragile and frail.  She battles feelings of insecurity all the time and yet, she's totally beautiful -both inside and out.

We battle these feelings because we are comparing ourselves to Victoria Secret models, celebrities, or just other women we know and whom we deem as beautiful.  Shame on us!

 So what if you aren't 18 anymore - what you are is a woman who has gained some knowledge over time.  You are stronger, wiser and braver than any younger woman is.  You have power.  You can create an atmosphere in your home and relationship that a younger woman could not.  You have so much to offer...it's your mind and the way you carry yourself that is beautiful.  You can command a room with a look, you can calm a child with a touch, you are a force to be reckoned with.

I lost myself for many years.  I felt ugly.  I lost my identity and if you were to see photos of that person next to the woman I am today....you would see the difference.  Today, I stand strong.  I have  confidence in my ability as a woman, I have courage to speak my mind, I have wisdom that only life's ups and downs could bring.  I am beautiful today because I took control of who I am and who I want to be.  I do admit that having a man in my life who does not go a day without telling me I'm beautiful or that he loves me helps boost my self-esteem...but he was not the one who took control back of my life.  In fact, he would have never dated me if I was some weak woman who had no confidence.  It was my strength, confidence and determination that allured him, most definitely not an unclothed body with wrinkles and scars.

Living in the shadows of yesterday is not for me.  I've chosen to start over with a will to fight for a better future, which means I have to accept and love who I am today and stop wishing I had that same body I once had as a young, naive, stupid girl.

For all of us who earned our stripes...whether through giving birth or just battling to survive!! 

We are beautiful!!

The greenest grass...

This is a life lesson to learn.  We always hear the phrase, "the grass is always greener on the other side"...we also hear, "the grass is greenest where you water it".  Both are true...but this phrase, hits home to me.

I have a beautiful life.  I have beautiful daughters, a great church, a Pastor who preaches the Word of God, a family who loves me and reaches out to me - both near and far away, and the love of my life, whom I've waited a very long time for.  I have so much to be thankful for and so much to protect.  

I am no longer praying for God to bring someone to me who understands me, gets me, completes me, loves me, honors me, laughs with me, dances with me, holds my hand...

God has blessed me with that man.  

As a woman who has lost greatly in life, I realize the value of what I have and I pray fervently for God's protection on him and our commitment to one another.  I pray for God's protection because I pay close attention to keeping the grass green.  I am devoted, loving, loyal and faithful to him because he deserves to be loved.  I choose to give him the best part of me because he gives me the best part of who he is as well.  This is not something that has happened immediately...we realized that we have to nurture OUR relationship in order for it to survive and thrive and thank God it is!

There will always be greener grass...but the sweetest grass is the grass you water, you nurture, you put your time and effort into.  If you focus on that, you'll eventually choke out any weeds and have a beautiful, healthy life.

Starting over hasn't been easy, but when I look at my future...I see it's all been worth it. 

 God had bigger plans for me than what I ever dreamed. 

This is one woman who won't be looking at the weeds in some other yard!

Judge not - lest you be judged

How many times have you found yourself thinking about someone else's life in a judgmental way?  I mean shouldn't everyone parent their children the same way as you?  Shouldn't everyone dress the same as you?  Shouldn't everyone believe the same as you?  Shouldn't everyone react the same as you in trying situations or choose to eat as you do or have the same exercise routine as you?

Sounds hideous doesn't it?  But yet, so often we sit and pass judgement on others who don't live exactly the way we think they should.  I'm not saying that we need to accept every lifestyle as "healthy" because not all are.  If you are putting yourself or others in danger, it's wrong.

What I am saying is...even though someone is, as the Christian world believes, "sinning" or perhaps not "sinning" but maybe just doing something you may not agree with...Does NOT mean you have the right to cast judgement.

No matter who they are or what they are doing...it's their life.  No one has to agree with another person's decision, it's called life.  Every person has been given the ability to make decisions whether bad or good, whether I agree or not.  It's not right for me to walk around and constantly give my opinion.  The moment we open our mouth spewing out our negativity...we show others that we need to spend time working on ourselves.  I honestly don't believe God himself, who sits on His throne sits around discussing our sins to the angels in Heaven.  What He does is continue to love us, draw us and give us opportunity after opportunity to know Him.

It's time to stop talking about those in your church, your family, your circle of friends...and start focusing on being the best we can.  Friends, life is too short to waste it on worrying about what other people are doing or not doing.  Begin praying about the situation, only good will come from that.  More often than not, God will begin changing your heart.  You may just find you have more compassion, a deeper burden for lost souls, a new walk with Him...taking your eyes off the problem and on the solution.

Starting over doesn't always mean a whole change of life...sometimes it just means we need to work on our own heart and attitude.

Here's to a day filled with hope, peace, love and joy.

Not criticism, gossiping, judging, and despair.

So thankful for a God who loves me in spite of who I am!!!

Your size isn't where your beauty is at...

We live in a society where love and beauty have been so distorted, it's sad.  Beauty is not about size!!  I've met plenty of "thin, skinny, in shape" women and men who are nut cases! They put more thought into their looks which will one day fade, than their heart which will be lonely one day if they don't change their ways.

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A beautiful woman who's constantly putting someone down, gossiping, cheating...is ugly.  

A handsome man who has wondering eyes, a lying tongue, an ugly mouth...is ugly.

The Bible has some things to say about beauty:

Psalm 139:14

1 Samuel 16:7

1 Peter 3:3-4

1 Timothy 4:8

Proverbs 31:30

 Do your part to build one another up...we tear each other down and don't even realize it.  Our bodies are changing at a rapid pace - there will always be someone prettier, someone more handsome...but there is only one you.  Cherish the one by your side.  Believe in yourself.  Allow 

 the love of God to radiate through you so that you never doubt your beauty.   

Be a man or a woman of worth!

As you start over...don't do it with a determination to change your outer man...start with the inside.

The measure of success

I love my boss...he's a wonderful man with many years of wisdom under his hat.  I am afforded the privilege of hearing him talk of days gone by, stories of time when life was simpler and relationships that have survived over the years.
One thing he often shares with us is to make memories.  He tells us that you can't take the money in your wallet with you, but you can hold onto memories for the rest of your life...long after you pass, there will be those who will remember you and the way you made them feel.

I see him walk towards the photos on the wall, as he's transported back to a time when he was a vibrant coach looking into the eyes, hearts and souls of a group of young men who trusted him to lead and guide them not just on the field, but in life too.  So many of those boys, now men...stop by to spend time with their leader, the one who believed in them.

He hasn't measured his success in life by his financial status ...but rather valuable experiences.  He says you can't measure a man by his wealth...you measure a man by his reputation.  Was he fair, was he honest, was he a man of his word?

Today as I reflect on my life and the many people who hold a valuable place in my heart...I can say I am blessed to be surrounded by some amazing people who value God, family and friends.  I hope they feel the same about me, that somewhere along the line I've learned that life isn't about what you have, but who you have.

Thankful this is an area in my life that I don't have to start over in.
Blessed, I am!

Simplify

I can't help but think of my relationship with my fiance. 

When we first began dating he asked me to give him 21 days.  21 days to keep the outside noise out...to give him and us a chance to form our own opinions about each other without any influence from others, negative or positive.  I agreed, and we did.  We not only agreed to that, but we chose to date quietly, not locally so as to not start a stir...we live in a small community and word travels fast.  We did what we could to protect the relationship and give it a valid chance.  It worked.

During the course of our relationship we have had to decide what matters most to us.  

Our past had formed us but we weren't going to let it define us.  We chose to let go of some old ways and habits and work towards creating a relationship that after being stripped down to the core, reflects us and where we want to go moving forward.  We had to define what would be detrimental to our autonomy and the success of our relationship and rid ourselves of those things.  We also had to determine what things matter most to us...and foster/protect those things.  

You don't do that by rushing...it's done slowly and deliberately.  It's not done by just following your "feelings"...sometimes it takes going through a few storms for us to realize just how much someone or something means to us.

Thankful heart today...thankful for cleaning closets, physically and emotionally.  Thankful for the storms that make you appreciate the beauty after the rain.

Time to simplify - for what matters most.

Starting over has brought me much to be thankful for!!

Focus on the good

It doesn't matter how wonderful life is...there are times when life just throws mud in our eyes!

It doesn't matter if you are on top of the world, if something comes along that tips you - 

you just lose focus.  

I've been listening to #JoyceMeyer on the internet for quite a while now.  I gain so much strength and inspiration from her teachings. She's consistently feeding into us that we have the power and control over our thoughts and mind to overcome life's negativity.  I am so thankful that I've been listening and studying these practices over the past several months because I, for one, can testify that it's working, NOT that I've perfected it...because I haven't.  I fall, fail, etc...but I can see and feel that transformation.  Life is just too short to waste time and energy on the negatives.  I truly don't want to live out the next chapters with hurt, bitterness, resentment and ugliness in my heart.  I want to be an over comer!

We all have battles, we all get tripped up, we all have needs, wants, desires, etc...we are human after all, but with those, let's keep our eyes on what God is doing in our lives.  

Give yourself a chance

Let go of the way you think it should be and give yourself a chance at a blank slate and an open mind to the future.

Don't carry around the baggage you've been holding on to into this new phase in your life.  Don't hold on to the negative opinions of others when you are beginning your new walk.  We've all made mistakes, we'll all make more, it's life.

Only you have the power to wipe the slate clean. 

I'm not telling you to pack all your things and move to a new town - you don't need to run from anything - you can just choose to make up your mind to dig your heels into life and stand tall knowing you're giving yourself the chance at starting over.  It's time to start creating the life you have always dreamed of having, one positive step at a time.

I dare you to believe in your future!

Do it anyway!

Cody McCasland

Born prematurely in 2011 and not expected to live more than a few days.

Cody's will was stronger than the circumstances, stronger than doctor opinions, stronger than evidence.  He does not let anything stop him....and I'm pretty sure he's faced more than his fare share of "bad days" and just look at his smile, precious!

What are you faced with?  Are you mad?  Are you angry at the life you've been given - the hand you've been dealt?  Look at Cody's face...he's running his race with a smile, with determination, with the strongest will to win...he's not giving up!!!  When you feel like you're in a losing battle remember Cody's story.  If this young boy can fight the insurmountable odds that have been against him since the moment he entered this world....you can win too!

We have to take the focus off the problem and start looking towards the solution.  We have to stop thinking about life with a poor me attitude - we are more than conquerors.  

Don't get tripped up on life's troubles as you start over.  Stay in the race! Keep running!  

"Ain't gonna be no rematch" -Apollo Creed (Rocky)

It was the story line that captivated the hearts of men and women, boys and girls.  Who doesn't love an underdog story?!  A struggling individual given a chance to succeed, fights his way to the top, wins the belt..and the girl! :)

I admit, I had a crush on Sylvester Stallone as a young girl...there was something about that man that had a little girl captivated.  I was 4 years old when the first Rocky movie came out in 1976.  He was the man tagged as the Italian Stallion! Heart be still!!  My dad...knowing how much I loved him, was able to have Sly autograph a photo for me which I still have to this day.  Ahhhhh :)

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Rocky's story isn't too far fetched to be yours too.  Maybe you've been knocked down by life.  You've lost your fight, that zeal to take another step, you may be down but don't count yourself out!  Muster up the strength of a fighter...change your mind set, shake off your blues and get back into the fight!!!  It's your fight...so win!  

You have one shot at this life...

Start this day with the mindset of a winner!!