Just recently I have discovered that I still have some walls guarding my heart. I didn't know just how high they were until that terrible thing called fear crept in. It's so sad for me to realize just how fast my mind can access a situation, formulate a scenario, judge the outcome and start the process of what to do next. It's not uncommon for those who've been let down to develop these habits, but it's wrong.
I have been in prayer each day since this moment of realization, asking God to break down the walls which still remain. Walls of doubt - walls of fear - walls of insecurity have kept me from enjoying life and now must be broken down so I can live the life God is blessing me with.
Sometimes things happen that shake our foundation but it doesn't mean we need to hide behind the walls in order to protect ourselves. We really need to just boldly trust in God to hold our hand as we walk through the uncertainty - building our faith and trust in Him for He never fails us.
Today I realize I have often glorified my fears as if they were some trophy I was able to show off when I reacted to a situation. I don't want that in my life. I want to be humble and face my fears with the strength of God and the promise He gives to be with us. Today transparency and honesty have to be prevalent in my walk, not only for my peace of mind but for those who are close to me as well.
God never promised the road would be easy but He did promise to lead and guide.
Saying goodbye to the things that built the walls brick by brick as I start over and thank God for this beautiful life He's blessing me with!!
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